Jay, 24. New Jersey. Writer. Poet. Lyricist. Music enthusiast. Lover of art in all its forms. Occasional socio-political blogger. I'll occasionally touch on sports as well. I make music under the pseudonym Complex Eternal as part of the collective 4EMR. All writing is original and owned by myself, unless otherwise stated. Any inquiries or comments, use the ask box.
  • The Need To Be Held

    The topic I want to speak on is “loneliness”. Everyone at one point or
    another has felt like they resided on an island in this thing called life.
    That of course leads us on a course to fill that emptiness swelling inside
    us. Some are lucky enough to find something or someone good to put
    in that place. Others aren’t so fortunate, and end up putting themselves
    in even worse situations.

    It’s this undying desire that guides some people to compromise themselves.
    Some jump with reckless abandon into relationships that have nothing to
    offer other than a body to keep them warm. It’s quite easy to find someone
    to hold, and it’s easy to mistake someone’s presence for caring. You have
    to take a step back sometimes and ask yourself the question “Is this real?”
    Too often, do we as people anxiously leap into situations that we don’t
    belong in.

    I was talking to a female friend of mine and she said something that really
    left me thinking “Wow!” On the topic of relationships, she told me that,
    she’d “Rather be unhappy than alone.” I believe that’s a problem. No one
    should ever want love or anything else so bad that they’re willing to
    compromise themselves. That statement or any like it denotes to me that,
    this person is trying to accommodate emotional needs with physical presence.
    That is a sure fire way to find yourself feeling even more lonely and depressed.

    Physical presence will never equate to happiness in a relationship. Maybe
    for awhile, if you have the wool pulled over your eyes, but eventually this
    person will come to the realization that this isn’t enough. There’s more to
    a relationship than the physical aspects. Even if one has a person on their
    arm to call their own, if there is no emotional presence that person is still
    alone. Being with someone and being emotionally disconnected, is no different
    than being alone. You’ll feel the same emptiness, maybe magnified, because
    you have a partner but yet they do nothing for you. Love is patient, you
    can’t rush it. 

    It all comes back to patience. Suffer through that loneliness you’re feeling
    and when the time is right, you’ll find yourself with a suitable partner who
    was well worth the wait. James 1:4; Let perseverance finish its works so
    that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
    We need to
    remind ourselves that timing is everything, and what we want may not
    coincide with what we need. As a result, what we get will be neither. 
    In the same way being too anxious may do us in, being indecisive and cold
    will afford us nothing much as well.

    There’s a difference between waiting, or being patient and being lazy, or
    inactive. Once an opportunity reveals itself, it will be no one’s fault but
    yours if you’re too timid to take a chance. There is no fear in love, thus
    there can be no fear in conquests for love. A fearful heart produces
    nothing. I leave you with a quote of my own.

    Be patient, but not lazy. Be earnest, but not anxious. 

    -Jared C.-

    1. thefearlesslyenchanted reblogged this from abstractdreamer
    2. lexland said: thanks for posting this.
    3. abstractdreamer posted this